Family Straight

I would like to thank the lord for what he has done for me and my family within my lifetime. Most dont know what i have been thru becuz i chose to smile thru the rain knowing that god would keep me on the straight path and that he would make things better in due time! And he has i mean im not suppose to be in a stable mind from the shit that i have gone thru but i am and the struggles only made me stronger than what i was! I mean just look my father used to be an alcoholic and constantly fight with me and my mother when i was younger he also was a major substance trafficer now he has quit that my father hasnt drank in a year in a half! Thanks to the lord! my father only served 4months in jail away from me! Thats better than some who only slanged a few dime bags or so! And take my mother for instance she has had plenty of chances to break up the family and have me and my brothers grow up almost fatherless but she is a strong woman and family comes first in her eyes. and i thank the lord for giving me a woman in my life like that! my father even went far as having a woman outside their marriage and still my mother kept us together and accepted my lil brother in the family within the family with no hesistance now that was a blessing i often feel like my mother is a saint now that i realize waht i went thru sometime i feel that i aint suppose to be here cuz i often think i should have been out on the streets or even worse but im not so for that i thank the lord! And now im Happy That my FAMILY STRAIGHT!

Who Knows!!

You know it is often said that everything happens for a reason but who knows? I feel that i have encountered some females and often feel they are the one but, who knows? I often feel that you just have to make things happen to know and not wonder who knows? I mean God plans everything in your life and its up to you to make the best of it and i have tried the best i could all thru my life to make the best of these situations but to truely know i will have to wait and see! Cuz when i think to myself who knows everyone should know the answer God knows!!!

Love

Love!! what is it? most think that love is this feeling that you have for this person, but in actuality love is a verb and not a noun cuz love is not a thing but in actuality love is an action that is a continous process until you cease to do that action. The true meaning of love is "giving one person the ability to hurt you but, trusting them enough not to do that." Now ask yourself have you ever been truely in love or not. I have once and i was hurt but i was in love. There are the different ways to use love. You can have love for one which basically means that you have strong feelings and that you thinkin bout giving them that ability. You can also love someone which means you have made that decision to give that one person that ability. Then there is the In love thing which means you are fully committed and completely trust that person not to hurt you when really they can easily manipulate you mind body and soul! So before letting that L-word slip out of you mouth again think about what i just told you!

To the One I want

This goes out to the young woman I have wanted since i laid my eyes on her. She is just an amazing female from my point of view there is not much that i wouldnt do just for her. Now i may not be able to give her everything, well i know i cant but she can have anything that i got. I mean i know she may think that im jus like every other guy but im not and she often sees me with other females but they dont mean not a thing to me and thats real! And if i gotta disown every other chick to get her then thats what i will do cuz my heart tells me she is a great one for me! I just have to prove it to her! She knows who she is (m.s.)

For my Parents

I would jus like to say that i have much respect and love for my parents who have always backed me no matter what. I love them so much. They have always put me in a position to succeed and jus make it throughtout life. And for that i jus want the world to know about the spectacular people that God put in my life! Thanks to Chris and Sherrrell Turner =)

Mississippi is a Trap

HAVE YALL EVA THOUGHT OR FELT LIKE YALL NEED TO GET THE FUCK OUTTA MISSISSIPPI? WELL I FEEL LIKE THAT ALL THE FUCKIN TIME I MEAN HELL MISSISSIPPI IS NOT WHERE MY HEART IS..... I WONDER SOMETIME HOW IN THE HELL DID MY FAMILY CHOOSE MISSISSIPPI OUTTA ALL THE PLACES IN THE WORLD I MEAN FROM THE PEOPLE TO THE BORIN ASS PLACES THIS PLACE IS FUCKIN WACK YA KNOW..... I CANT WAIT TIL I GRADUATE IMMA GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE NO MATTA WHERE I GO LONG AS IT AINT IN MISSISSIPPI..... I MEAN I REALLY TRULY WANNA RETURN TO THE JIG (BATON ROUGE) AKA MY HOME TOWN.... THATS WHERE MY HEART IS AND YOU KNOW WHAT PEOPLE SAY HOME IS WHERE YO HEART IS SO I GOTTA GET OUTTA THIS HELL HOLE OF A PLACE.......

How to hide pain behind a smile

HOW DO YOU HIDE PAIN BEHIND A SIMPLE SMILE? WELL HONESTLY I DONT KNOWBUT EVERYDAY I CONTINUE TO DO THE SAME THINGAND I WONDER TO MYSELF DO PEOPLE ACTUALLY CARE?OR CAN THEY JUS NOT TELL HOW I FEEL?I MEAN SOMETIMES I JUS WANNA SNAP ON MY FRIENDSCUZ I SMILE BUT I WANT THEM TO REALLY ASK AM I OKAY,I JUS WANT SOMEONE TO REALIZE THAT ON THE INSIDE IM DYINGBUT I DONT WANT IT TO SHOW!MY PAIIN IS OVERWHELMINGAND IT OFTEN STRIKES LIKE A THIEF WALKIN THRU A OPEN DOOR AT NIGHTI OFTEN ASK MYSELF TO JUS EXPRESS MYSELF BUT MY PRIDE DOESNT ALLOW ME TO DO SO,SO DAY IN AND DAY OUT I HIDE MY PAIN BEHIND A SMILE SOMEDAYS I JUS WANNA CRY BUT I JUS SMILEBUT REALLY I WANNA DO THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE,I KNOW IT MAY APPEAR THAT IM JUS THE HAPPIEST PERSON ALIVEBUT REALLY IM SLOWLY DYIN AND DRIFTING AWAY INSIDE I JUS WISH SOMEONE COULD REALIZE MY PAIN!!AND JUS TAKE IT AWAY BUT IT DONT WORK LIKE THAT,SO I JUS CONTINUE TO BURY MY SORROW BEHIND A SMILE A SIMPLE DECIEVING NON-CHALANT SMILE SO I STILL WANT TO KNOW HOW DO YOU HIDE PAIN BEHIND A SMILE?